Discontinued

Monday, May 31, 2021

Content Warning: Depiction of anxiety.


I met with my med provider / yesterday / virtually of course / of course / not because there is a pandemic / but of course because I’m too anxious / to drive on the interstate / my husband says it’s the safest way to get around / but I prefer the good ole highway / she said I was doing well / she asked when I last took my lorazepam / I told her I couldn’t remember / dawns had been the shade of pink / they were supposed to be / they didn’t shove themselves down my throat / and make me cower / for sun’s coming / she told me / she would discontinue it / heat pinned down / in my chest / no! / I spurned / I want - I need to carry it around / it keeps me safe / her and I both knew that a pill bottle didn’t hold magic / but I needed to believe it lived in there / she said I could still carry my bottle around / until the days bled with glory / she discontinued the prescription / I clutch the orange tube tightly / I would fear crushing it / but I know / it holds the ground sturdy


This piece was published in Issue 6 of The Hearth Magazine. 

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